Further FUP policies

• All forests to be sold off & the “Right to Roam” laws revoked (we don’t want preachers of hate radicalizing swathes of trees!).

• David Cameron & his descendants to get a pig’s head on the 1^st day of Michaelmass term at Oxford in perpetuity. The pig to be delivered live on TV by Boris Johnson & his descendants

• Applicants to high office required to duel for the job. 1^st one to draw blood from the opponents torso gets the job. [As a bonus, this will make “The Apprentice” more entertaining then some rectum monkey’s trying to flog tat and being shouted at by a fat old bloke]

• Union strike laws to be toughened up with a minimum of 99.5% of the eligible members voting to be considered legal with unions required to give a minimum of 6 months notice so businesses can get ready.

• Pubs allowed to serve beer in quarts and flagons. All foreign wine banned and replaced by British wine (which will have become tremendous due global warming). Want lager or poncy cider with ice? Fuck You!