Kent officially listed as ‘missing’
Army of naked albino’s mysteriously vanishes
Martial law declared in Gloucester
Riots in Aldi as shoppers fight for last remaining ‘gloves & hat’ promotion.
Feral zombie sledgers sighted in Sheffield
Wolves seen searching for food in Wallsall
‘Winter is Coming’ memes crash Facebook
Kate Windsor wears a dress
White Walkers spotted in Wimbledon
Archaeologists discover the original ‘Snowman’ in Swindon
Mr Tumnus glimpsed entering DFS wardrobe department
Jack Frost arrested after being caught on CCTV vandalizing windows
Social media now approximately 98% pictures of snow
Prince’s William & Harry baffled by their partners request for new dresses
Polar bears and penguins avoiding each other
Yeti’s spotted in Yeovil
Trolls complain about cross-bridge tariffs
Live-action production of “Frozen” announced in Fleetwood - Army deployed
Vanilla Ice re-releases seminal track “Ice, Ice Baby’
Horrified reporters assured that Doncaster always looks that bad
Kate Windsor & Megan Markle wear different dresses
Snowmen march on Westminster complaining about the price of noses & eyes
Supermarket launches ill-advised ‘barbecue weather’ promotion
Northern man nearly goes out without his hat
Naked rambler complains about loss of assets
'Yellow snow' starts trending on social media
'Flat white’ takes on a different meaning in Hoxton
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