Asylum IX memories

In no particular order:

• Bloke dressed as a pirate turning up & dancing as fire brigade band played the "Pirates of the Caribbean" theme
• "All Hail The Bishop of Squid!"
• Being declared an acolyte of the above
• Anointing with anchovies
• The unlikely couple and the cactus babies (succubus v succulent)
• Nearly collapsing towing suitcases up the hill in the hot sun
• Going on an old Routemaster between sites (uses to operate in Newcastle)
• Seeing a "Theramin" playing the "Star Trek" theme
• Chatting the 'Well' about the future of the festival
• An excellent billy band playing in the garden of the Lion & Snake
• Lady Violet Hugh onstage at the Engine shed & in the Castle doing the only 2 clean songs she has
• Bloke on Friday saying 'You're joking!' when she waved her pearls
• Watching the Queen's march and 'Shouty man', Ian H, being surprised by his daughter turning up as Queen Victoria (Malika's idea)
• Watching "Much Ado About Nothing" at 'Brass Goggles University
• The steampunk R2D2 at BGU
• Bloke at BGU winding up Lady Elsie about the medals
• Ghost stories and gins with Lady Malika
• "Granite"gin & the Spanish strawberry gin
• Standing from Newark to Stevenage due to the incompetence of the beardy bollock's company
• Lots of kids at Stevenage station
• Idiot child getting annoyed when we pointedly ignored her antics
• Discovering we were 2-0 up against Le Arse at 1/2 time in the play/match
• Tasty burger that took ages while Lou had pulled pork & burger combo
• Lots of pizza
• Breakfast at the 'Wig' - the porridge looking like puke
• Nice tea/coffee/teacakes at the small cafe near the 'Well'
• Meeting Mr Crighton & companion on the walk up to BGU
• Taking part in the Promenade & Jamie getting kicked out of it
• Eamonn being a shameless poser
• Eamonn getting spanked by SMG for being drunk and disorderly
• Martyn resting his gun on Lou's head/hat
• Lou only coming up to high bicep not Martyn's shoulder
• Amy Elizabeth Smith smiling at a child dancing in front of her on the way to the  Victoria
• Big, big soft wolf at the house
• The Low Sheriff of Lincoln
• Jamie et al reading the test-tube labels
• Alice's astounding rendition of "I don't know how to love him."
• The "Steampunkalo" (not copied from another work in any way)
• Susan wetting herself at Phil's magic trick
• Sam wearing boots completely unsuited to climbing stairs
• "Victor & The Bully" being awesome ('Bully' throwing his hat onto the horns of 'Victor')
• Not buying medals in the market that didn't happen
• Kid telling Tinker that 'There is nothing to see here."
• Wizard in the Westgate: Kid: "Dumbledore!"; Wizard: "Gandalf."; Kid: "No you're Dumbledore."
• Wizard later spotted asleep in front of a tree at BGU
• "Chitty, Chitty, Bang, Bang"
• Wacky Races team coming last s they were stopping to hand out biscuits
• "It wasn't me speeding officer!"
• Bloke with bike who looked like Jinna
• Thinking about a parasol holder then finding a sword holder that will do the job
• Selecting rabbit skin
• Lady Violet at the Flashman Rules Tea-Dueling: Bees in her bra; "My nipples are getting quite hot!"; the Safety Elf volunteering to help find bits of crumb that went down her front; propellor down
• "Man chuffed to bits" & 'Mornington Crescent' achieved
• Pies & Lincolnshire sausages running out at the Westgate
• Pubs running out of food on Sunday lunchtime
• Locals with jugs of Pimms moving their table regularly to stay in the sunshine
• "Victor & The Bully playing "Always look on the bright side of life" & loads singing along
• Being so many on the Promenade we had to double up; Malika asking if people could put their group's name on their banners; 'It's too long to fit'; 'Get a bigger banner!'
• "Captain & The Lost Waves" at the soiree & then the lead singer (Welsh?) turning up on the ghost walk
• Dragons galore: wooden walking stick; lady with huge dragon on back; eggs for sale at the illicit market
• The "Pilots Licence" exam - realising I was at the front & now had to lead off despite having no idea where I was going...
• Chip at the chippy on the way to the shed: good chips and nice fish cake with cheesy chips for less than a fiver!
• Dancing person dressed as "Scooby Doo" at the Castle
• Taling to a young lady with  "Cheshire cat" on her back who'd come from Edinborough with her Mum (she joined MFO for the Promenade)
• Lou buying purple goggles with the "Cheshre cat" n them (+ some nice hinged baubles to make into earrings)
• For once, not eating anything from Greggs
• Went to co-op for some bags and lady behind counter nearly charging £647.20 for 3 plastic bags instead of £2.20
• Rockets from the NSC care of Malika; "This is the British Space Programme ... Malika's going to kill me for that!"
• Phil stroking his shaft and waving his balls about
• Multiple "Deadpool"s including one on a unicorn in the William (landlord didn't know w it was
• "Deadpoolls"s mate dancing with a old plate camera photographer to music by  "Victor & The Bully"
• 'K9' being photographed by a tin plate camera process
• "West Ham" steampunk lady
• The 'spaceman' with the popcorn popping helmet
• Chap with the robo-parrot on his shoulder
• The bloke with the massive hand
• The lady with the merry-go-round skirt and the foam horses
• The lady with the solar system skirt that actually revolved (turning key on back too)
• The Martian Expeditianary Force with parading with Martyn standing out
• Martyn running away from a young lady
• Alice's flamingo umbrella
• Phil's world coat made by Baiba
• The massive mandala by the cathedral and kids getting their names added
• The 'Angel of Death' with black feathered wings and a cage with severed heads in it
• The lady with the cage backpack with Disney characters locked in it
• The lady with the octopus/kraken glove puppet
• Drunken arseholes climbing onto one of the knights & hoping it broke and either castrated him or sliced his cock off; being disappointed it was OK the next day
• Bloke playing sax in doorway of the Magna Carta
• Struggling to hold the MFO bnner into the wind, especially round the corner between the White Hart & the Magna Carta
• Fluffy in the 'Rudolph' mask
• Talking to Baiba about the banners she made for the White Rose, Sheffield groups etc 
• Walking past a child who said "Mummy I know she's a steampunk because she has goggles."
• Making the mistake of telling Phil about the dance f the 7 beer towels which he wanted Lou to re-create in the Magna Carta
• A HUGE spider running across the bed which Ian tried to catch with a cup
• Waking up and looking out of the window to see the Lincolnshire Wolds as the sun was just coming up and mist rising from the hills
• Finding the Roman wall behind the hotel
• Knitted 'Lincoln Imps'
• Burning rubber smell on train + squeaky noises ...
• Lincoln Imp on the legs of the knight by the William
• Asking Lou on bus to BGU if it reminded her of childhood trips to the seaside (beef paste sandwiches, cheese scones & ginger beer all made by her Mum)
• Little poodle thing wanting to get to know a dog big enough to eat it in 1 bite
• Watching a young squirrel casually wandering about the lawns garden
• Adult steampunk having a conversation with a 3 year old about how metal buttons could be a pain when they get hot
• Listening to the comments of people who've never heard Lady Violet Hugh's songs before & being pleased that a friend was such a success at the Soiree
• Discussing the pro's & cons of corset's & big boobs with Baiba
• Seeing Michael S by the Assembly Rooms & spending a pleasant 90 minutes with him
• Listening to some good tunes at the William IV on the quayside before heading home
• Woman at the quiz writing down the answers so she could read the books/watch the films