Gothic Nostril: August 2017

In no particular order:

Bloke dressed as a pirate turning up & dancing as fire brigade band played the "Pirates of the Caribbean" theme
"All Hail The Bishop of Squid!"
Being declared an acolyte of the above
Anointing with anchovies
The unlikely couple and the cactus babies (succubus v succulent)
Nearly collapsing towing suitcases up the hill in the hot sun
Going on an old Routemaster between sites (uses to operate in Newcastle)
Seeing a "Theramin" playing the "Star Trek" theme
Chatting the 'Well' about the future of the festival
An excellent billy band playing in the garden of the Lion & Snake
Lady Violet Hugh onstage at the Engine shed & in the Castle doing the only 2 clean songs she has
Bloke on Friday saying 'You're joking!' when she waved her pearls
Watching the Queen's march and 'Shouty man', Ian H, being surprised by his daughter turning up as Queen Victoria (Malika's idea)
Watching "Much Ado About Nothing" at 'Brass Goggles University
The steampunk R2D2 at BGU
Bloke at BGU winding up Lady Elsie about the medals
Ghost stories and gins with Lady Malika
"Granite"gin & the Spanish strawberry gin
Standing from Newark to Stevenage due to the incompetence of the beardy bollock's company
Lots of kids at Stevenage station
Idiot child getting annoyed when we pointedly ignored her antics
Discovering we were 2-0 up against Le Arse at 1/2 time in the play/match
Tasty burger that took ages while Lou had pulled pork & burger combo
Lots of pizza
Breakfast at the 'Wig' - the porridge looking like puke
Nice tea/coffee/teacakes at the small cafe near the 'Well'
Meeting Mr Crighton & companion on the walk up to BGU
Taking part in the Promenade & Jamie getting kicked out of it
Eamonn being a shameless poser
Eamonn getting spanked by SMG for being drunk and disorderly
Martyn resting his gun on Lou's head/hat
Lou only coming up to high bicep not Martyn's shoulder
Amy Elizabeth Smith smiling at a child dancing in front of her on the way to the Victoria
Big, big soft wolf at the house
The Low Sheriff of Lincoln
Jamie et al reading the test-tube labels
Alice's astounding rendition of "I don't know how to love him."
The "Steampunkalo" (not copied from another work in any way)
Susan wetting herself at Phil's magic trick
Sam wearing boots completely unsuited to climbing stairs
"Victor & The Bully" being awesome ('Bully' throwing his hat onto the horns of 'Victor')
Not buying medals in the market that didn't happen
Kid telling Tinker that 'There is nothing to see here."
Wizard in the Westgate: Kid: "Dumbledore!"; Wizard: "Gandalf."; Kid: "No you're Dumbledore."
Wizard later spotted asleep in front of a tree at BGU
"Chitty, Chitty, Bang, Bang"
Wacky Races team coming last s they were stopping to hand out biscuits
"It wasn't me speeding officer!"
Bloke with bike who looked like Jinna
Thinking about a parasol holder then finding a sword holder that will do the job
Selecting rabbit skin
Lady Violet at the Flashman Rules Tea-Dueling: Bees in her bra; "My nipples are getting quite hot!"; the Safety Elf volunteering to help find bits of crumb that went down her front; propellor down
"Man chuffed to bits" & 'Mornington Crescent' achieved
Pies & Lincolnshire sausages running out at the Westgate
Pubs running out of food on Sunday lunchtime
Locals with jugs of Pimms moving their table regularly to stay in the sunshine
"Victor & The Bully playing "Always look on the bright side of life" & loads singing along
Being so many on the Promenade we had to double up; Malika asking if people could put their group's name on their banners; 'It's too long to fit'; 'Get a bigger banner!'
"Captain & The Lost Waves" at the soiree & then the lead singer (Welsh?) turning up on the ghost walk
Dragons galore: wooden walking stick; lady with huge dragon on back; eggs for sale at the illicit market
The "Pilots Licence" exam - realising I was at the front & now had to lead off despite having no idea where I was going...
Chip at the chippy on the way to the shed: good chips and nice fish cake with cheesy chips for less than a fiver!
Dancing person dressed as "Scooby Doo" at the Castle
Taling to a young lady with "Cheshire cat" on her back who'd come from Edinborough with her Mum (she joined MFO for the Promenade)
Lou buying purple goggles with the "Cheshre cat" n them (+ some nice hinged baubles to make into earrings)
For once, not eating anything from Greggs
Went to co-op for some bags and lady behind counter nearly charging £647.20 for 3 plastic bags instead of £2.20
Rockets from the NSC care of Malika; "This is the British Space Programme ... Malika's going to kill me for that!"
Phil stroking his shaft and waving his balls about
Multiple "Deadpool"s including one on a unicorn in the William (landlord didn't know w it was
"Deadpoolls"s mate dancing with a old plate camera photographer to music by "Victor & The Bully"
'K9' being photographed by a tin plate camera process
"West Ham" steampunk lady
The 'spaceman' with the popcorn popping helmet
Chap with the robo-parrot on his shoulder
The bloke with the massive hand
The lady with the merry-go-round skirt and the foam horses
The lady with the solar system skirt that actually revolved (turning key on back too)
The Martian Expeditianary Force with parading with Martyn standing out
Martyn running away from a young lady
Alice's flamingo umbrella
Phil's world coat made by Baiba
The massive mandala by the cathedral and kids getting their names added
The 'Angel of Death' with black feathered wings and a cage with severed heads in it
The lady with the cage backpack with Disney characters locked in it
The lady with the octopus/kraken glove puppet
Drunken arseholes climbing onto one of the knights & hoping it broke and either castrated him or sliced his cock off; being disappointed it was OK the next day
Bloke playing sax in doorway of the Magna Carta
Struggling to hold the MFO bnner into the wind, especially round the corner between the White Hart & the Magna Carta
Fluffy in the 'Rudolph' mask
Talking to Baiba about the banners she made for the White Rose, Sheffield groups etc
Walking past a child who said "Mummy I know she's a steampunk because she has goggles."
Making the mistake of telling Phil about the dance f the 7 beer towels which he wanted Lou to re-create in the Magna Carta
A HUGE spider running across the bed which Ian tried to catch with a cup
Waking up and looking out of the window to see the Lincolnshire Wolds as the sun was just coming up and mist rising from the hills
Finding the Roman wall behind the hotel
Knitted 'Lincoln Imps'
Burning rubber smell on train + squeaky noises ...
Lincoln Imp on the legs of the knight by the William
Asking Lou on bus to BGU if it reminded her of childhood trips to the seaside (beef paste sandwiches, cheese scones & ginger beer all made by her Mum)
Little poodle thing wanting to get to know a dog big enough to eat it in 1 bite
Watching a young squirrel casually wandering about the lawns garden
Adult steampunk having a conversation with a 3 year old about how metal buttons could be a pain when they get hot
Listening to the comments of people who've never heard Lady Violet Hugh's songs before & being pleased that a friend was such a success at the Soiree
Discussing the pro's & cons of corset's & big boobs with Baiba
Seeing Michael S by the Assembly Rooms & spending a pleasant 90 minutes with him
Listening to some good tunes at the William IV on the quayside before heading home
Woman at the quiz writing down the answers so she could read the books/watch the films

Just wondering if it would be overly cynical of me to this that the latest nonsense on stilts from Davis & May is deliberately designed to be rejected.

The EU27 want to sort out the exit bill, citizens rights & the Anglo-Irish border. The government want to talk about post-exit trade arrangements.

They want to leave the customs union for a customs federation.

The EU27 have said sort the 1st bits then we'll talk about post-exit arrangements. There is the issue of customs arrangements explicitly hanging over the border but having an transitional deal just kicks that particular can down the road.

Any agreement has to be agreed by all 27 states (including in some cases both national & regional assemblies), the European Parliament & the EU Commission. Any one of these could veto any proposed arrangement (Ireland are already said to be unhappy).

I'm wondering if by starting off without a clue then producing papers with proposals that have a fly's fart chance of being adopted it gives Maybot an out: "Well we tried to get a deal but those meanies in [insert assorted names here] didn't want to play ball/vetoed our entirely sensible proposals."

Gothic Nostril

Thursday, 31 August 2017

Asylum IX memories

Tuesday, 15 August 2017

Cynical thought

Having your cake & eating it strategy

Friday, 4 August 2017

The 2017 death list - People who've left early to avoid the post-apocalypse rush