Highlights of 2012

In a somewhat random order (ie as I remember them).

• Asylum 2012 in Lincoln
• Steampunk on the Thames
• Twilight in the Museums - the Steam Museum
• Abney Park at Scala in Kings Cross
• Sunday Driver (3 times)
• London Zoo
• Ann getting Jack & Ben
• Wind In The Willows Steampunk Picnic & Punting Party
• 75th Anniversary of the Computer Lab
• Vintage Fair @ the Guildhall in the snow

Royal Preganancy

The economy is in the toilet, big companies avoid tax & the middle east looks on point of war, no jobs for kids, the NHS is being privatised. & the disabled are all labelled benefit scroungers.


But rejoice peasants, the royal cock works

The 'Royal' Sickness

I reckon Kate Wales hasn't really got morning sickness: as that Dr Who docu-drama hints, she's been bitten by a royal werewolf.

My money's on Phil the Greek (aka 'Moonie').

Christmas meal rant

Why does every place seem to do a 'Vege' option that is a variation on squash and goat's cheese risotto.

This might be fine once but not every bloody year. It's as if the idea of doing anything else doesn't compute.

What's wrong with say mushroom and quorn welllington, nut roast, lentil loaf, brie and cranberry tartlets or even some kind of lasagna with a Christmas twist?

I reckon it's just plain bloody laziness.

While I'm on the subject, not everybody (vege or carnivore) likes Demon's Testicles (sprouts) or Beelzebub's bottom scrapings (cabbage). There's plenty of delicious veg out there that would brighten a festive table, red and green peppers for example.

Electricity cock-ups

From Al Murray's twitter feed

Merseyside United

Thank you Everton FC #hillsborough #JFT96 #merseysideunited

Hillsborough reflections

Today we mourn for the dead whose memory was defiled by the authorities and celebrate the quiet dignity of the families search for justice

The 96 who didn't come home never walked alone.

They never will.



#Never ForgetNever Forgive #JFT96

The Guardian/iPhone 5 Review

The Guardian's video review of the iPhone 5.

Sponsored by Samsung. 

#teehee

Hillsborough 2

South Yorkshire police deliberately changed or fabricated evidence as they tried to cover up their responsibility for the deaths

While people were fighting for their lives they were already planning how to shift the blame onto the victims.

• They took blood alcohol samples from the dead, including children
• They searched the criminal database, presumably, hoping to find information they could use to further inpugn the dead
• Police altered 164 records, 116 of them significantly
• The chief constable decided over dinner at a restaurant that the line to be taken was that the victims were to blame.
• Sources of Sun newspaper coverage was a Sheffield news agency and local Tory MP Sir Irvine Patnick
• This lead to the Sun's newspaper coverage.

As Cameron said, "Today's report is black and white the Liverpool fans were not to blame for the disaster.

As @OliverKayTimes tweeted 'Those who've campaigned for the truth on Hillsborough were once a suppressed minority. Now the minority are those left clinging to the lies' 

Perhaps the most shocking thing of all was the fact that if South Yorks police hadn't been too busy mounting a cover-up potentially 41 people might have been saved.

The abitrary 3.15pm cut-off time in the travesty of the inquest helped hide this. While there is no way of knowing if any would have survived, the fact that even 1 could have been saved is a dire indictment of both the police and the ambulance service.

This was compounded by the fact that the families, who must wonder if their loved ones could have been saved, have had to bear the lies and calumny thrown at them for nearly a quarter of a century. It turns out that they were right and the authorities have denied them and the dead justice.

For years Liverpool fans have been labelled as murdering scum. Finally we can see the real murdering scum were the South Yorkshire Police.

In short, Fans left to die, children tested for alcohol and dead checked for criminal records. And people question why families fought for this day

I also wonder if the fact that the Sun/NOTW got away with it 23 years ago was what lead them to believe they could do anything. One consequence of this 'untouchable' ethos was the fact that they felt they could hack phones and get away with it.

And, by the way, we all know that Kelvin MacKenzie is only apologising because he's attempting to preserve his income. Will the BBC now stop spending my licence fee on the the disgraced, disgusting scumbag Kelvin MacKensie?

Hillsborough 1

Hillsborough: Nobody in authority has ever been prosecuted, disciplined or taken official responsibility for the failures that led to the disaster or the cover-up that followed. #JFT96

Are you extracting the urine Mr Cameron?

After 'Call me Dave' Cameron's reshuffle we now have:

• A Health Secretary, Jeremy Hunt, who describe the NHS as a' 60 year mistake' only three years ago. He also supports homeopathy, is anti-abortion and against stem cell research.

• An Equalities Minister, Maria Miller, who is against gay adoption or IVF for lesbian couples and in favour of defining homophibia, racial hatred and other prejudices as simply 'freedom of speech'.

• An Environment Minister, Owen Paterson, who denies climate change, is in favour of fracking and once compared the banning fox hunting to National Socialism.

• At the same time the Home Secretary, Theresa May, who has presided over so many shambles it's not surprising she doesn't know the date is still in a job. 

• Likewise the Chancellor, George Osborne, who has presided over an economic shambles and a double-dip recession somehow still has a job. Unlike the thousands of public sector workers whose jobs he axed while giving tax cuts to his rich chums.

Are you taking the piss Mr Cameron?

It certainly looks like it.

Minister for Murdoch gets a new job

Jeremy Hunt looks like a man trying to explain to A&E staff why he has a ketchup bottle stuck up his bum. Perfect for the Health job then. #reshuffle

Liverpool FC

Once again I'm despairing of the shambles the club appears to be descending (further) into.

We've loaned out a striker, Andy Carroll, we (over)payed for just 18 months ago despite never giving him a decent run in the team. We currently only have 2 senior strikers in the squad, one of whom is new to the club, the league and the country. I feel for the big man - it wasn't his fault that Dalglish had a load of money burning away his back pocket. It's not his fault that Newcastle sold him for silly money but now he'll always have the 'flop' tag attached to him. I still say he has the talents to be a top striker and I just hope we don't come to regret this.

We have tried to loan out Henderson in order to get an Clint Dempsey in. Henderson refused to swap, as is his right. It seems we can't even afford to actually buy Dempsey and our pursuit has lead to Fulham making a complaint about it. If found to be true we could have a transfer ban imposed, something that would seriously hamper us. Imagine being stuck with Stewart Downing. For years.

I believe Fulham were asking £15m, which means they'd accept around £7-10m. What does it say about the club if we are so cash-strapped that we can't afford that? All those fans who are looking for a 'marquee' signing should reflect on this fact ...

Meanwhile the damage done from previous seasons is still playing out and I fear that it's going to get a whole lot worse before it gets remotely better. I'm not saying we'll be relegated but the chances of us challenging for the title are getting more remote by the day. When Spurs, Sunderland or QPR can outspend you then that's a concern.

Looks like another frustrating "transition" season at Anfield.

Essex Lion update

Breaking development in the #essexlion story

Olympic medalists v Buggins Turn

According to thr Daily Telegraph "Britain's Olympic medallists to lose out to mandarins in honours" (Article)

While the merits of a system that rewards the numerous Sir Humphrey's of Whitehall for doing their job have been debated endlessly, the government have managed, once again to shoot themselves in the foot over this.

But one answer did pop into my head: a new award that's like France's Légion d'honneur.

This new medal/award could be named something like the Praetorian Cross and be limited to those who achieve something unusual or noteworthy in the sporting world. While primarily focussed on the echievements of TeamGB it could also be awarded to those who, like Micael Phelps or Usain Bolt, who perform some unusal feat. 

I'd have former olympian Princess Anne handing out the awards. Maybe at a big dinner in London.

There would no more problems with quotas and so no need to choose between Bradley Wiggins, Jessica Ennis, Mo Farah, David Weir, David Roberts, Darren Kenny et al for the big gong.

Note to the media: On no account, given the man's single-handed attempt to destroy the legacy before the closing ceremony, should you descibe this as a Gove Gong!

Things I've learned today

So far today I've learned:

• the 'G' in 'G-string' stands for groin
• there is a department at Nottingham University who study pavements and roads.

Mo Farah Runs Away From More Things

Mo Farah Running Away From Things

Standard Chartered

Given the extradition & jailing of the NatWest3 by the US are the British directors/executives of Standard Chartered worried more about potential criminal charges (and what  may follow if found guilty) or the collapse of their share price?

By the same token, I doubt FSG/Liverpool FC will be less than happy to have the name of a bank described by the US authorities as a "rogue institution"on the front of their shirts.

While Standard Chartered has denied the charges, it's fair to say that there may be worse to come for both the bank and it's senior individuals.

LibDems membership collapses

Report in the Telegraph that the LibDems now have fewer members than the population of Corby.

Nick Clegg's supporting the raising tuition fees, "reform" the NHS & the shake-up the welfare system to cut benefits might have something to do with it!

Not such a challenge

Two Daily Mail quotes: One post-opening-ceremony. One post-Ennis. Turns out it wasn't such a challenge after all.

Overheard

Overheard this morning - Girl to boy who dropped her off: "Love you."

Boy: "Say love you Daddy."

Girl: "NO!"

Boy: "Say Daddy."

Girl: "Love you Daddy."

Me: *sniggers*

Games Legacy

Dear Mr Cameron, if you truly wanted to secure a legacy from the Olympic Games you could simply cease your shameful cutting of funding for school sport & stop Michael Gove agreeing the to the sale of playing fields.

Church: 'gay marriage' means state/church split

The CofE claims extending marriage rights to same sex couples would provoke "the biggest rupture between the state and the Church of England since it became the established church 500 years ago."


I wonder if Henry VIII would be familiar with some of these arguments .... It was partly his (repeated) attempts to divorce his wife (whoever she was at the time) that caused a rupture between state & church that led to the CofE becoming the established church in the first place.


Given that you can marry in castles, hotels, museums even the Globe or a lighthouse, just how many people gay or straight, would actually want to get married in a church anyway?

Doors

What is it with doors? What about doors seems to bamboozle Cambridge folk so much?

Your see the opening. You pass through the aforementioned aperture. You keep going,

It's not rocket science. It's not brain surgery.

A lobotomized gibbon could grasp it at the second attempt. Even Nick Clegg would only require a coule of months tuition to grasp both the concept and the the application.

Is this a phenomena unique to the clots of Cambridge or is this cretinous smeggery more widespread & I never noticed?

If she weighs the same

Charlie Brooks claims his wife, the fragrant Rebekah, has been subject to a witch-hunt. 


So, according to the Gospel of Python, if she weighs the same as a duck ... 

Burn her!

Climate change conferences

Thought for the day: have you noticed how climate change conferences are always in places like Rio or Durban, never Grimsby or Splott?

Liverpool

Right now I'm appalled by the mess FSG have made of my beloved club.

Liverpool have no manager, no assistant manager, no director of football. ne communications officer & no CEO.

And the new stadium appears to be further away than it was under the despicable, lying, oxygen-stealing shitbags, Hicks & Gillette.

x:¬(

It's a funny old game - part 2

February: Spurs challenging for the top of the table 


Then Fabio Capello quit. 


May: Spurs end up in the UEFA cup.

It's a funny old game

Manchester City are Champions of England, Chelsea are champions of Europe & Roy Hodgson is manger of England.

In the land of the legless

In the land of the legless the bipedal man is king.

And 5 time winner of the arse-kicking championships.

Fred Goodwin

Sircumcision (v): removal of a knighthood. #ued

Snow Buddah

A fantastic Buddah, made out of the snow on Midsummer Common, Cambridge (makes most snowmen look a bit poo in comparison).

Some of my Tweets regarding the Gove Boat

Michael Gove today proposed spunking £60+ million away on a new yacht for Queenie's jubilee, a magnificient present for a rich women from a grovelling, lickspittle shite.

• Mr Gove, if we can get rid of useless teachers, will the same rules apply right up the chain of command? #fortheloveofgodjustgo
• Still can't believe Michael Gove wants to spunk £60m+ on a boat. Perhaps we can loan HRH one of the aircraft-less aircraft carriers.
• If Michael Gove really wants to buy the Queen a big, pointless boat, can pay for it out of his departmental budget. #TheGoveBoat 
• Alternatively, every department in Govenment has to cough up £5m. That'll make him uber-popular round the cabinet table. #TheGoveBoat
• Austerity (n): to cut benefits from the disabled & poor in order to pay for a large boat for a rich old woman. #TheGoveBoat #ued
• In any case it seems Cameron plans to give Queenie a big gift. He's busily clawing money from cancer patients & disabled kids to pay for it.
  
  
  2 others (retweeted):
  • Tim Doble @BetterThanToday Mother is losing her job as a consequence of libraries being shut down. Meanwhile, Michael Gove wants to spend £60m on a yacht. #thegoveboat
  •  Matthew Doye @MatthewDoye  To pay for Gove's proposed yacht would take 1,167,315 weeks of higher rate mobility DLA from disabled people #TheGoveBoat #wrb

Sandstrom oven

We bought a Sandstrom combi microwave/oven from Curry's in September (for £100). The only design flaw is that of the interface between the rotator and the turntable as the 'pegs' aren't deep enough but it is useable.

Or at least it was.

On Sunday 08/01/12 Lou warmed the oven up to 200ºc & put her pheasant in. We were watching the football when there was a huge bang. When she investigated Lou found out the the glass (?) tuntable platter has broken into 4 pieces.

When she contacted Curry's stating that this had happened, she was told that we can have a replacement (should think so too!) but we'd have to bring the whole oven back, rather than just the plate.

We are quite annoyed about this as it means either taking 2 taxi's (£15 - £20) or trying to take it on the bus (still around £10).

As this is less than 4 months old we are NOT happy.

La Redoute naked man

French fashion chain La Redoute has been left red-faced after it forgot to airbrush a naked bather from a promotional photograph for its children's clothes. Since then he's appeared all over the place!

Random thoughts from last night

1. What does it say about our country when we can spend £10bn (+) on two weeks of sport but can't afford to help pensioners keep warm?
2. All Liverpool's defeat by City really proved is that Man City's multi-millionaires are miles better than our multi-millionaires.

Bank holiday drink in the Tivoli

We popped into the Tivoli on the 2nd of January. As we sat there, 2 guys went past paddling surfboards.

Back to work :¬(

Tuesday brings a return to work. The printroom was pretty cold as I went round plugging stuff back in. This was after battling high winds to get to work (Ceri tweeted that she wasn't in Kansas anymore, which summed it up quite well).

Nothing in the inbox so I downloaded & edited photos from NYE etc tinyurl.com/7o7dxzj

At around 11am there was one of the most vicious rainstorms I have ever seen - howling wind & horizontal rain. By lunchtime the storm had passed and there was blue skies.

Sales & Yikes!

Having had a tip-off from Mooley that LA Senza were having a big sale we  went over. After rooting through the 38GG & 36F stuff (not to mention the size 18 pants) Lou got a bodice/corset thing & a red bra for £10. Result!

Passed info & showed stuff to Dick & Alissia - they plan to go on Tuesday.

Jarad came into the pub on crutches. Apparently he'd swung out of the van on Wednesday and landed on a stone. Despite being in a lot of pain they made him work. He assumed he'd bruised it. He finally went to A&E to find out that he'd actually split his heel bone! 6 - 8 weeks on crutches.

Christmas Week Pt 5

NYE: Spent the morning trying to find more bits for the pirate outfit. Got a big belt and some elasticated pants (which I cut off @ the knee). Went to the Isaac @ 12 and watched the hysterical defeat of ManU by the mighty Blackburrn.


We popped in later to show Dick & Alissia our outfits.
Lou: stripy shirt, purple jacket, black coat, blue boots & 5 o'clock shadow (eye shadow) & hat.
Ian: white evening shirt, military jacket, cut off keks, stripey socks.


When we got to the party Hayley gave us an envelope with the 1st clue in a treasure hunt. This had about 8 rounds and took about 2 hours to do. We didn't win but it was fun. Lou had pulled pork (not much veggie food) while we were working out some of the answers.


The pub also had a photo booth so we did one set each and 1 together. Linkhttp://www.picture-pod.com/portnye11.html


Tweets: 

• @LouieTwist has finally surfaced. Hangover not too bad apparently.#neverdrinkingin2011again
• @ 11.50 last night she was pished @ 00.10 she was in the "I love you mate' stage, Had to support her home @ 00.35.

At lunchtime we went over to ther pub and watched a truly dire game between West Brom & Everton, followed by ManCity blowing the chance to go 3 points clear. Well played Sunderland.

Christmas Week Pt 4

Bank Holiday Monday: We went over to Ann's place for drinks & nibbles/ While she's still unpacking the place looks more like a proper home now. She liked her pot & I liked her fire-effect heater that she'd got for the blocked fireplace. I also liked the bottle of Metaxa she'd bought as a present - very appreciated!

Tuesday: Didn't do much. Went over to Isaac to watch Spurs play. The boys were doing a bet on 1st scorer.

Tweet: Joy & disappointment in pub as Spurs score: joy that they did & disappointment that nobody had picked him in 1st to score competition.

Tweet 2: They're now discussing a roll-over for the next scorer. A lot are switching from Norwich to Spurs players.

Tweet 3: Jamie is very happy: he had Bale to score next goal.#bigpot#thisroundisonyouson

Wednesday: Went into town to look round the sales. Dind't see anything I liked in the shops but did see an enormous boat going through Chesterton crossroads. Wouldn't say no to that.

Thursday: Can't remember doing much. In the evening found out that we'd won 2 tickets to the NYE party at the Portland Arms. Result!

Friday: Went looking for pirate gear for party. Also picked up a pair of boots in Primark for £10 (£15 less than I was going to pay in late OCtober/eraly November). Result!

Lou got a pirate hat which suited her.

Christmas Week Pt 3

Boxing day: We went over to Granchester for the new year barrel rolling. We got a decent spot 1/2 way down the course. Until the CEN photographer plonked his kit right in front of us. Met Amina there (with her current chap). We watched a couple of the races before retiring to the Green Man. They had a beer marquee out the back of the (very packed) pub. They had heaters on (1 hot air & 3 gas fires) do it was quite warm. In fact I had to take coat & jumper off as was so warm. It got even warmer as more people came in.

Oddly, there were 2 ladybirds wandering around. A sign of global warming?

Jolly Snoutsman was decent but Lou's Fellowship Porter was bloody disgusting.

We had a nice walk back and went to the Isaac for a few and then went home for remains of Xmas meal.

Christmas day: After staying up till 2am watching track Santa, we had a quiet start to the day. We got up & had bubbly around 09.30. After opening the presents (Lou liked her pony) we called the rellies. Also called Lynda & Pete in Shetlands. They had been up since 6 to watch fire-barrel rolling (barrel filled with tar & kindling). It seems like it was an excuse to drink. They'd had a fried breakfast and were doing the same thing on Boxing day. Lynda thought I'd bought Lou a real pony and wondered if we were going to keep it in the garden.

We went over to the First & Last for a pint. Watched a bloke lose his brand new helicopter toy on the roof of the hairdressers. We did plan to go to the County & see Joey but we bumped into Henry & went to the Baron for a pint with him.* After 3 or 4 pints, wer ran away as, had we stayed, we wouldn't have been eating.

Lou said the guineafowl was tasty. My lentil roast didn't quite set (forgot to get eggs) but was tasty.

* Interestingly the Baron of Beef were doing food and a lot of people (tourists?) were having sunday roasts.

Christmas week Pt 1

Monday: Went to the Post Office in Cowley Road as 2 presents had gone there. It took 70 minutes of queuing to get the boxes. That's another hour of my life I wont get back. On the plus side a steam train did go past.
Tuesday: Shopping for Lou's presents. Managed to get a few bit's for her.
Wednesday: Went to a formal dinner @ Queens College (arranged by Meg). Sherry on arrival then into the dining hall. Grace and then beetroot & goats cheese/Vege nut roast/merengue-toppped mince pie/port/coffee.Very nice and very Christmassy.
Thursday: Drinks & mince pies @ 4CMR.
Friday: met Lou & Hazel for a coffee & a snack.
Saturday: Stayed in while Lou went out to do Xmas shopping. Didn't have any brandy in Aldi so we went to Sainsbury's, getting a bottle of Verve Cliquot for Jamie for his MIL (as he'd forgotten).